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Fansy the Famous Bard. A True EverQuest Story

Journal Entry: Sun Jul 20, 2014, 11:30 AM

This had me rolling on the floor. I fucking loved this one:D

Online gamers are MacGyvers of murder. There is nothing they can't improvise into death and grief, an art perfected by Fansy the Famous when he inverted a rule preventing high level players from bullying beginners into genocide. The Sullon Zek server was an infamous "no rules" haven of exploits until Fansy made it cry uncle.

The server was 70 percent evil and 20 percent neutral, turning the usual epic battle between good and evil into a circle-stomp on good's weeping face. Every fight went the way combat between an army of evil and a few lone heroes would actually go.

Fansy was a level 5 good bard -- in EverQuest terms barely potty-trained and so low other players couldn't attack him. His only combat ability was running faster than a group of lumbering Sand Giants. But Fansy had a plan. He realized that his simple, intimidating power could be turned into a devastating weapon could kill everyone everywhere. So in the middle of a battle that he had no right surviving for more than a minute, Fansy provoked two dozen of the Sand Giants into attacking him.

This probably looked profoundly stupid to anyone who bothered to pay attention, since Sand Giants can kill everything. And then Fansy started running. What he'd realized is that Sand Giants can only kill what they can catch. And since he was one of the only things in the game that didn't fall under that category, he could kill everything with Sand Giant while they tried to catch him. Fansy annihilated vast swathes of the server by running away at them.

But Fansy's true exploit was making sure his victims deserved it. He'd wandered around the "no rules" server like a fantasy Forrest Gump being nice to people, wearing bright colors, and being called Fansy, ensuring that everyone had called him a fag at least twice. Then he unleashed vengeance with a vast conga line of burly giants pounding everyone's asses.

At which point the cool evil players suddenly decided "no rules" was unfair and whined until moderators arrived. The first moderator to show up said "cool," reminded Fansy there were no rules, and enjoyed watching him do it. The second asked him to stop, based on a rule on the no rules server (which hadn't existed earlier that day), and Fansy acquiesced. All someone had to do was ask nicely! Which no one on Sullon Zek had tried, although they had tried calling him a no-life 12-year-old basement-dwelling homo one million times.

It's a little strange that people playing a fantasy game would hate him so much, since he's basically recreated the the exact plot of Lord of the Rings for them: a small, underpowered idiot using unkillable allies to defeat a land of evil. We're sure the irony wasn't lost on Fansy, and that he was just too nice to point it out.

Taken from…

Fansy! A true defender of the weak^^

skin made by :iconyuhime:
  • Mood: Joy


Artist | Hobbyist | Digital Art
Current Residence: Earth. which is in space.
Favourite genre of music: Black Metal
Favourite style of art: 3D
Operating System: Windows 7
MP3 player of choice: Media Monkey
Favourite cartoon character: Richard (Looking For Group) Oglaf
Personal Quote: Beware of the dog. The cat is not trustworthy either.


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britton1999 Featured By Owner Edited 6 hours ago
some of your art is badass,but some of your art gives me the weirdest borner and i don't know why?
Rastifan Featured By Owner 5 hours ago  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Then you are welcome:D
JeffreyHoffman Featured By Owner 3 days ago
Liara boobs.... that is all
MoShaol Featured By Owner 5 days ago
*unwrapping the sandwich out of subway wrapper*  Sasha Blouse (Eating) [V1] 
Darius--Styler Featured By Owner 6 days ago  Hobbyist Writer
Where oh where have the trio gotten to? :P
Rastifan Featured By Owner 6 days ago  Hobbyist Digital Artist
They will be back. No worries:)
Hashae Featured By Owner Jul 16, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Hey R man, how have you been?
Rastifan Featured By Owner Jul 16, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Busy working on DE. Else fine:)
Hashae Featured By Owner Jul 16, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Good to hear that's coming along, how did you manage to keep all of your models though?
Rastifan Featured By Owner Jul 16, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
A complete backup of the old forum.
(1 Reply)
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